Dancing Through Anxiety

I feel like when I write my posts I tend to take on a positive tone even when I'm talking about my times of depression. I wanted to do something a little different and show you all what my thoughts are like when I'm really struggling. I don't want your pity or anything, I just want to show you how it is for me on my bad days. How depression is real, and how my thoughts turn negative when it's a rough day. I found some entries I wrote in my journal from some really bad days I have had and thought I would share them. I wanted to give an example of the true thoughts that run through my mind during the bad days to show you what people with a mental illness have to overcome on a daily basis. Just a disclaimer, this is really vulnerable and completely out of my comfort zone. I have an easy time sharing my progress and my good days or even reflecting back on my bad days but this is different. This is an inside look into exactly what my brain was going through during a de...

Wow it seems like forever since I've written. I was off enjoying a wonderful vacation with my mom, visiting a bunch of different family up in Northern California. Although I got back last week, I needed some time after my vacation to collect myself and try very hard not to slip in to a depression after all the energy I spent. I've been doing really good lately and making a ton of progress. I've been leaving the house more and even started driving again after a year and a half of only being able to handle being a passenger. The thing that is hardest for me in pretty much anything I do lately is keeping momentum. I'll be good for a few days and then will hit a rough patch and have a hard time getting back up on my feet. So to help work on getting to a place of regularity and continuous progress I've made some goals to help keep me on a positive path.   The hard thing for me is that I have so many things I want to work on and I want to fix all of them at once. One...

Or for us single people insert the word friends or family for boyfriend  Now that I've got my anxiety semi under wraps I've been focusing a lot more on my depression. This is also due to the fact that I can recognize now when I'm feeling depressed, whereas I couldn't do that in the past. The hardest thing though is that I don't want to focus on my depression. To focus on it is in my opinion to accept it and I have a very hard time accepting that I go through times of depression. I'm starting to realize though that I can't just push it away when it comes or try to ignore it, because then it is just going to become bigger and want more attention. Just like when learning how to deal with my anxiety, I had discovered I had to create a relationship with my anxiety instead of just getting rid of it, I need to do the same thing for my depression. To me though this is so much more difficult. With anxiety the worst that would happen is that I would have a ...